This time of year can be full of associations related to a script.  Xmas can be a period of expectations that one has to adapt to from relationships, celebrations, spending, overindulging and drama.  The magic of this time of year is really about relationships, love and good will.  This is a significant part of the real script of this time of year which holds authenticity and warmth.  Its with this we can have generosity of heart to those who don’t have as much to be thankful for.  The lonely, homeless, ill and suffering.  Spending some time on this is perhaps what this time of year needs to invite more-off.

We had a renewal process at the Bayberry Community which was fantastic for us all.  I was so proud of the individuals who had put so much work in on awareness, the steps, therapy and intimacy.  Additionally, the tenacity this took and the continuation of this on maintaining spiritual well-being and understanding more and more about the life  script process.  At one point i got very emotional which was evident to see which highlighted the pride i had in the community.  It makes our work as therapists worthwhile and confirms our belief in people, faith, love and hope. ” One should never give up on the self” because  “one is worth the input to live to ones full potential”..

I believe that script work is very helpful for individuals present for addictions treatment.  True the old conventional old school 12 steps seems to help many initiate the recovery process and maintain abstinence, however how many of these individuals eventually relapse through acting out on unconscious life script processes.  I am a advocate of the 12 steps and a big believer in the social support aspect of 12 step recovery.  I also see relationships with others as a crucial element of the addiction recovery process.  Addicts need other addicts. People need other people. We as a species need others to survive.  Human beings are pack mammals and are genetically made up to need each other, without human contact we emotionally shrivel up.  The 12 step literature states that the therapeutic relationship of one addict helping another is without parallel.  It also states that an addict alone is in bad company.  So how is this relevant to life scripts?  A common narrative within the 12 steps fellowships is “I never felt I fitted in anywhere”, “I felt different to others”. I thought others knew something that i didn’t.  This is TA terms would indicate the presence of a “Don’t belong” life script where individuals may feel as if they are always on the outside looking in.  Both my personal experience and the evidence would also support that the fellowship is a powerful tool in helping others change the life script.  Members often state that they no longer felt alone after finding the fellowships.  The belonging, connection, commonality, purpose and inclusiveness.  Therefore consciously of unconsciously script work is happening in the fellowship, however there is so much more we can do as clinicians working with addictions to give our clients a head start.by stepping into recovery by moving away from old scripts and reaching their full potential as human beings.

These early formations to our construction come from many different areas as we as humans absorb much material.  The modelling we get from parents, significant others etc.  Attributions, suggestions, non-verbal communications and our general environment.  These impact how we think and behave and can drive us to fulfill a frame of reference (how we see the world and our lives) that we are not even aware of.  If find it very “mind overwhelm” that this is true .  In fact through my professional life i have put obstacles and questioning in front of this.  However, both personally and professionally i have seen people live out life script.  The power and compulsions that can drive us and have consequences. 

Next Thursday 12th and 13th of December we are having a renewal process.  I am so looking forward to this as i find get together’s such as these so exciting.  To hear what people have learnt, their experiences, aspirations, connections and just to touch base.  We are looking at a combination of learning from brain and development and how this fits with addiction.  There is a link with attachment, emotions and script.  This then transfers to how the 12 steps is relevant to all of this.  Its great having a team of people that are passionate about what they do and want to teach others.

I did a group today on strokes which are units of recognition.  These are emotional units and  important to human beings.  They can be negative, positive, conditional, unconditional, verbal or non-verbal.  Its was so interesting the discomfort at taking positives freely.  That being able to absorb them and really believe that they are true or that we are entitled to them is not that easy or natural. The group was really willing to go with the process and be honest about what they felt about the exchange of strokes and linked this to parts of their life script.  Through childhood we can be taught that to absorb positives can be boastful or not appropriate.  Yet we all need them for survival.

I believe this step to be very personal and individualistic in relation to beliefs, aspirations and faith.  However, I do see people as searching for a spiritual link or connection in times of vulnerability and pain.  We all have insecurities and can be fear driven thus, a healthy and compassionate introjection can be of great comfort to us.  In definition this is what we can build inside of us by a process of practise and reaching out to believe.  The process by which aspects of values lead to a formation of a internal world that is compassionate and supportive.  The step can help individuals develop a nurturing side which is important for mental health.  This nurture is absorbed into or incorporated within the self and thus becomes “part of” us.   This can be seen as the practise of step 2 and engaging in a higher lever of consciousness that is spiritual and kind.  The  development of an  internal nurturer in psychoanalysis could be seen as a healthy  “Parental Ego State” that contributes to positive direction.  This Parental Nurturer does not justify and rescue but is compassionate, empathic and supportive.

In life people, places and things will kick our stuff “script”. This brings up often unwanted feelings. There are roads of choice here to look at.  If we close of and become defended we don’t learn or evolve.  If the discomfort is enough this puts individuals into relapse and active addiction.  If we follow a principled way of living “The Steps” , we can open our hearts to the compassion we have inside. “Step 7”. Our scripts hold the power to make us involuntarily shut down “defences” “contaminated beliefs”.  This is why self awareness is so important.  It helps with resilience that even if discomfort is escalated we can eventually have access to our genuine heart and authenticity.  WE  ALL have this potential with practise.  We revive script by feeding it like addiction itself.  Only we do this be feeding it with internal conversation or behaviours that have consequences.  All can be toxic and escalate feelings that seem out of control.  This is when we are in script  and  not in the here and now reality.

I got so much motivation from the energy of the staff that I worked with this week .  We did some lecturing on Life-Script- Steps and how this weaves through our psychological processes.  What I really loved is them being up for looking at their own life scripts which takes courage and commitment and how they wanted to help their clients by their own awareness.  I find that we are more grounded if we look at our own stuff as all human beings have this.  It can disempower the process of hiding and avoiding.  Additionally this day held for me the ground breaking work that can be done on life script and addiction.  This in itself keeps me spiritually connected to what is important.

This is the fabric of step 1 and how individuals are powerless over using the substance of their choice.  This then can transfer if they give up a particular substance to then cross addiction as a substitution .  Its almost a primal process of stimulus hunger which does not connect with adult decision making capacity.  The script is similar in its way of the construction being based on child survival strategies .  This is often unconscious and therefore one can be powerless over the drivers and emotional compulsions that process the life script.  If we think about patterns of behaviour that seem out of control emotionally it can mean we are in script. It can feel that we are being driven by something larger and more powerful then our own steering system.